Writing as therapy..


Writing seems to help me get my feelings out of myself..I have always felt different or misunderstood..Yes we are all different..Then throw in a cancer diagnosis and your life is never the same,,

I try to not burden people with my problems..We all have issues and problems..But throw in medications that change how you think or make it difficult to concentrate..difficulty sleeping that makes you groggy in the morning.,and causes emotional issues..etc.,And throw in the what ifs..if I only had surgery last year..would the cancer be gone,,did I cause my cancer.,did I not do enough..Feeling like no one understands..

And the pressure to still work,,even if it is for myself..and is flexible..I still feel I have trouble concentrating..and worry about making a mistake..Hopefully the side effects will subside..the tumors will shrink,,I can lose the weight..and I am still alive..sometimes I think life is too hard..I don’t want this life anymore,but I trudge along and try to keep fighting.,

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