We are here to help each other..This is something my boyfriend keeps saying which is a bit surprising because he isn’t really religious, but it makes sense..I sat with him on a cold porch Friday night handing out Halloween candy..I didn’t want him out there by himself., plus I knew he wasn’t feeling well..He wanted the kids to have candy and this way our dogs wouldn’t get upset from the doorbell and knocking..Hopefully he didn’t get worse from being out there.,we were only out for about 2 hours and he did go inside a few times..A neighbor kid with his group mentioned to his buddies that “they don’t talk to us”..no one listened and took our candy and so did he..A few other kids did not stop at our house on purpose..I have heard a kid or two call me weird..and I was starting to take it personal..I have been called weird..and many adjectives thru out my life..and quite frankly it’s getting old..I wanted to write a note to the parents who told their child they don’t speak to us..but I decided to pray for them instead.,Yes..maybe the child is autistic..and can’t think for himself..and trusts his parents who work in the medical field.. Who you would think would be caring loving people..maybe to their own KIND or class..so be it..I didn’t snub their child and not give him candy..
I have been called weird, different,ugly,so many names..and I use to believe them..IT DOESN’T MATTER..I can’t please them..I have tried..it never works..so now I am on meds that make me moody..fearful.,all sorts of lovely side effects..but I am still alive..weird or not..it’s just an opinion..and doesn’t really matter..
So back to helping people.,so why would I want to help people..people have been very cruel to me..many times I did just want to die and give up..Because as I am quoting..from my own inner guidance..”my dear, you are here for a reason” I could have moved back home with my mom..I chose to live with people who aren’t family..Who, struggle financially.But for some reason I felt I was suppose to be here..Are the neighbors lovely sweet people..no not to me..Is the neighborhood anything special..it is nice..but they are just people ..maybe a little snooty..is it embarrassing being a grown woman living in someone’s home? sure..
Rick told me a story about his neighbor Andree..who was also sick, but came over to try to fix the furnace..he told me how he bought a new heating system for a couple who fell on hard times, but once had money..
I decided to give away some nice coats I have..One is a Calvin Klein down coat..They no longer fit ..yes I could stick in a bin but I really want to give it to someone..maybe a cancer patient who gained weight like me..and needs a larger size..I was inspired by the young lady who ended her life yesterday with brain cancer..She said to pay it forward..And so I am..Weird or not..crazy or not..blah blah..I am still here..not hiding ..living..as long as I can..willing to help..Because isn’t that what life is about..